


Fun × Family × Bonds

by pontaii



Category: Hunter X Hunter
Genre: Additional Warnings Apply, Bad Jokes, Dysfunctional Family, F/M, Family, Family Dynamics, Injury, Killing, M/M, Mental Instability, Murder, One Shot, Reader-Insert, Self-Indulgent
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-25
Updated: 2020-06-25
Packaged: 2021-03-04 00:35:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,040
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24914713
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pontaii/pseuds/pontaii
Summary: “Is ir worth being tortured for?”“Yes,” no hesitation as you said it.“How bad of torture are you thinking of?”“I mean, any kind of torture is just torture in the end, so I don’t care,” you actually didn’t just see the point in these questions. If it was going to be lots of fun in the end, your mentality couldn’t make you care more about the cost of this fun.
Relationships: Illumi Zoldyck/Reader
Kudos: 67





	Fun × Family × Bonds

**Author's Note:**

> this, was a lot,, and the rare work I actually finished in one setting, so 👏 if you already read the tags and are like even a smidge unsure if to continue, REALLY think about it because I'm probably too tired to remember if I tagged everything, because this y/n(reader) is a dumpster fire and I'm just basically self indulging in it,, e n j o y ~

You weren’t as mental as the public made you out to be, nor nearly as bad as your own concept of yourself was - it was truly the fine line of not standing close to anyone infamously crazy, but also knowing you’d never fit back into  _ ‘the average’ _ even with all the time and therapists in the world. It was just your strong mentality infused with some questionable ideals.

It  _ really  _ made you pop.

You were the perfect meaning of your parents calling the police on you and waiting for their arrival, while desperately sobbing, “Where did we go wrong??!” While both of them being the indirect cause and catalyst. For letting you play rough on the streets for a bit too long.

_ Your mother’s hand dug into your wrist sharply, you were probably pinned to the floor. _

There was a difference to country, hillbilly type of streets, to where you had family vacations in private cottages when you were only five and on your way to being spoiled rotten. It was a sunnier place. The kids were nice there, they played fair.

But Yorknew and it’s streets were where you were born, and while the rich neighborhood you belonged to was safe beyond anything else - even with all the specially designed child playgrounds, it was no fun when even your closest friends and playdates rejected all of your more dangerous (but fun!) proposals. And so in a moment of dejected boredom, you were easily convinced and coaxed into tag along with the older boys.

It was definitely a decision that could’ve ended in a lot of ways. It was a bad place for a child, but exactly your childhood mind was a bit too short on this notion - if anything was even a bit more fun than home, then this must be paradise!

And after finding the tiniest of thrills with like-minded kids at your eleven or so year age, and a few older ones that thankfully knew how to regulate how far is too far, coupled with a bit of innocence from thinking these streets as fun as the country ones, and parents that didn’t question much as they cleaned your bruises when you came back home after a beating - and your father appraising you  _ for showing ‘em who’s boss _ \- you found yourself… drawn in.

If you weren’t already in deep from playing such games as hiding from  _ The Bad Man _ after the scrawny boy had proclaimed him to be of no fun, or the entirely excellent game  _ How Many Wallets Can You Steal Without A Drunk’s Bottle Hitting You,  _ then the deep eyes of Illumi, who was but twelve and your meeting was entirely accidental, drew you down completely.

_ The hot of your mother’s palm squeezing down on your neck was unpleasant, so you kicked her off of you and got up. Your head spun as you stood, and you nearly lost the thought of Illumi - that would’ve been no fun. _

There are only three years of your so-called street life you remember truly, and while your first year was like the premium experience to get the gist of it, you soon stopped playing these games. It was simply through observing that you saw that those who played the most also were the ones you never saw again at a point.

So you set down a rule, one that only slightly trampled the game idea, but kept up your resolve when other kids realized how over their heads this situation was and ran home; if it isn’t fun, then it’s not worth it.

Stealing a few wallets? Agitating a few drunks? Kicking some people down or running? Yeah, why not, it’s just plain fun. But the mafia wasn’t one of these fun things, and their guns were even less fun. They never stayed or even wondered the same alleys as you did, the respectable ones that is, but there were a few  _ scum  _ that would come especially to empty their magazines even at the expense of children. And while it certainly would be fun to do a few in and teach them a lesson, death was not fun.

You had seen a girl being shot in the leg, but it was quite never enough to shoot one bullet, so soon she was ridden with holes. If bullets didn’t do her in then, the bloodloss sure did.

There wasn’t much left to do other than to run, whenever a gun was fired, and it was only those times when your heart truly protested in fear.

All these shootings would often be in the outskirts of Yorknew, and while that is where they happened the most, it was the time you feared least for there were many abandoned buildings, incomplete projects or unsold houses, all full of places just waiting for you to hide until the scum got tired and left. So when a bullet grazed past you in central, it sure sent more of a shock through you.

It was dark, and you only managed to run a few blocks away before realizing you were probably pushing your confidence in outrunning the mafia, their bullets not far from you at any time.

The part that screamed for survival kicked in and you forgot about having fun for the time.

And you took a turn into the first building that had its entrance open even at this forsaken hour. It was a hotel, and while your nerves fired at the bad decision, the empty reception desk made you reconsider as you ran past it and down the many halls.

Only after a few unlucky knob-twisting, a door finally opened to a room and you rushed in, ready to count some sorries or knock the unlucky resident unconscious for the time being, did you truly could thank your luck - and the hotel’s incompetence. With a big exhale you slid down to the floor, eyes nearly closing after a while.

It was sad, really, even if it was a bad time to reflect upon it, that just because of the mafia, the small made-up family you had did dwindle apart, for if not the ones that left themselves, the big fallout was because of these scum, and then the people left like you often strayed from one another. Even if your family’s oldest member at the time was sixteen and also quite emotionally questionable, it was quite the unique experience you do wish to have again.

But it was silent, far too silent, and you realized that you were expecting a resident to be here and likely scream at you, but none were. And even when you looked around, the blinds were drawn and no lights were on, despite the room being in a state of utter mess. You were truly torn on whether somebody was even here, for maybe the room wasn’t reserved, but as the slightest of sounds caught your attention, you started to ponder a different question.

Before you stood a boy, possibly just a bit older than you, but no less perplexed as you were - or at least you thought so as you cocked your head to the side when your gaze fell on his deep eyes. Both of you clearly wondered about the other, both of you clearly not meant to be in this room. The only one that was meant to be here layed a few steps behind this boy, covered in blood and bleeding wounds. The boy’s hands too were bloody, a knife in his hands, still staring at you even as you observed the room.

He looked quite timid, if not for the blood.

_ There was a slap across your face and you felt disappointed as you caught her wrist when she attempted her next assault. You put a finger to your lips and shushed her, “Shhh, I’m trying to remember what was I to do today,” and there was a glimmer of strange love on her face before your hand crushed the bone of her wrist in your hand. _

“Did you kill him?” Your tone of voice was that of a child eager to learn.

The boy didn’t speak nor nod, and his grip on the knife tightening didn’t go unnoticed.

“Was it fun?” This time you even leaned forward, your body actually wound up in anticipation of the answer.

This seemed to crack the blank face on the boy and you were surprised you saw this slight change of emotion even in darkness, though only by his eyebrows rising up before he composed himself again, less agitated even if it was just the childish way you approached this topic that made him open up, “It depends, this was an easy job, don’t think I felt anything.”

You couldn’t really add to that, but your gaze always kept on the boy, watching him put away the knife with a sigh, and after a bit of contemplation, “Help me move the body,” it was a command, but you didn’t feel offended as you pranced over to the corpse and did as asked. The corpse was heavy and really unappealing, so instead you focused on the one good prospect in the room.

“What’s your name?” You looked pleased even when the boy kept quiet for a minute, at first nearly looking offended that you’d do small talk while carrying a corpse, then just a bit of apprehension remained.

“Illumi,” it was the most monotone way you heard anyone speak, but you still bloomed a smile, trusting that Illumi was his real name.

“And mines (Y/n)! So we can be friends now, right?” The corpse fell to the floor as you released it after Illumi had done so too, it was then property pushed under the bed by a bit of kicking - you weren’t sure why Illumi chose to do this, but kicking the man was sure fun and you weren’t going to say no to  _ that _ .

“...No, I’m too busy for friends-”

“What’s taking up your time?”

Illumi peered at you, and even when you felt a chill rack up and down your spine and the room seemed to drop by a few degrees in heat, you still stood awaiting the answer. Illumi was a mystery, and weren’t mysteries fun?

“I’m in need of specialized weapons,” Illumi’s knife flew past your ear with this, and it really  _ was  _ a drag as it didn’t even stick in the wall even with such a throw, only cluttered to the ground shamefully. The design on it was incredible and it seemed to be meant to be coated poison, in a way impressive but, “and as you can see, I’m not having any luck.”

You took a pose as you started a monotone humming, hand rubbing your chin as you actually put thought into Illumi’s troubles, only if his friendship seemed the most enticing thing in the room, emotions fluctuating wildly, “I’m thinking… something sharp! Like hooks or needles- though you might need something a bit bigger than a sewing needle if you need to kill someone..”

The wave of Illumi’s hand dismissed your attempts and you were back to just watching him, this time really not knowing if these ideas would stick to him at all since you did think solving this problem would make him less busy enough to have a friend. He really did change so fast from absolutely timid to fully in control, it just made anything he does next more enticing.

“My family doesn’t like having friends,” Illumi’s statement felt cold as he ran a hand through his black locks, but he continued before you could think of protesting, “But your ideas are valid enough for consideration, and also worthy of thanks.”

You watched with a tilted head as he really approached you close - all this time you hadn’t come closer than five feet or so, not out of hostility, but of the sheer fact you two really did just meet, and under quite grand circumstances - and out of all things he could have done, you felt his hand on yours.

It was so light you nearly didn’t feel it, though his face also offered no explanation as he only looked down at your fingers, “Why do you seem to value friendship?”

It was the most innocent question, but you felt that Illumi was far from innocent even as you answered, this time really thinking it through, “Well.. friendship is just another plus side of having fun, I don’t even think there’s such a thing as a boring friendship.. and I’ve been  _ so bored _ ,” you stopped and took a breath, there was no use trying to be whiny now, and you truly tried articulating it, “It’s…  _ worth  _ a lot I think.”

“Worth being tortured for?”

“Yes,” no hesitation as you said it.

“How bad of torture are you thinking of?”

“I mean, any kind of torture is just torture in the end, so I don’t care,” you actually didn’t just see the point in these questions. If it was going to be lots of fun in the end, your mentality couldn’t make you care more about the cost of this fun.

There was a hum, again so emotionless you wondered how Illumi could make such a sound. His both hands clasped at your hand tightly now and your eyes were drawn to the unexpected caress, so much so you couldn’t anticipate or even see what happened before there was sheer pain spreading through the right side of your face as you slumped but caught yourself against the wall.

_ Back then _ you were confused, especially when the last words Illumi spoke to you before you promptly passed out were quite cryptic, _ “My family wouldn’t like you as a friend, but if you manage something special within a year, I’m sure I have an offer,”  _ and upon waking up, still in that dingy hotel room, you found ten knives set right before.

Now, as you stood with your unconscious mother at your feet, you really were about to shake with laughter how you nearly didn’t solve this riddle in time. It was just a small invitation to kill ten people, and while that took you quite a while to figure, you didn’t waste time on finding someone that could train you in Nen, for you actually were offended at first, for Illumi  _ had  _ punched you even if the punch had gifted you this gift.

It was about to be the last day of the one year Illumi had given you, and considering you had only killed five people at first and so cautiously at that, that the faces of your first three victims actually didn’t make it on TV but just as missing person reports in the newspaper, and even when deciding to make the fourth and fifth a grand and gruesome ordeal that truly landed on TV, it wasn’t special. But tonight you decided to have some fun.

Your family had exactly five maids, and it really was a shame you couldn’t kill all five at the same time, for the fifth one ran to tattle on you to your parents, which brings you back to your conscious self. It will be soon till you could actually hear the police sirens, and simply guessing your fifth intended victim wouldn’t be still sticking around you took to breaking into one of the neighbor’s house and ended the last kill there - it wasn’t as grand as you expected, but damn did you wish it would suffice.

Running from the police when they hadn’t even arrived in all this time was laughably easy, and you actually found yourself struggling more to orient yourself into any back alley that would be near the hotel - now currently out of order thanks to a scandal of a man being murdered there, apparently he was a big shot or something - where you expected to see Illumi soon.

It had been a year, and so you truly thought that Illumi could have forgotten this promise - and you wouldn’t hold him strictly guilty if he would end up breaking it, for he was and still is but a teenager, if not a child that has all too grown up. He still had introduced you to Nen, and on some days you were sure you would have died if not for it.

And as a figure soon approached from the shadows, just a bit taller and his hair but a bit longer, and somehow even more emotionless, it really was a joyous sight to you when the moon really shone on Illumi himself. And even so, he held an air to him that was entirely pleasant, if not actually teasing, but it soon seeped away just as he opened his mouth and his speech was if not the more monotone than the last time.

“You still hold the same views about torture?”

“It’s nice seeing you too, and of course I do,” you still welcomed him with a bit of a teasing greeting, but your answer was truly serious.

“Even if you’d be assuredly tortured by world level assassins?”

“If the fun is worth it, I still think I wouldn’t care,” You did raise your eyebrows at that statement, but you still spoke honestly for you were more impressed then frightened by this new prospect if true.

Illumi was truly expressionless now, and you couldn’t even read if this is the answer he wanted as a minute of silence stretched between the two of you, and after you had waited patiently you got an answer, even if it came with a huff, “No matter who you’d ask in my family at this time, I’m sure everyone would object to this  _ friendship  _ you want to pursue.. but my mother does love children a lot, and while you are quite childish, I’m sure we could open a space for you.”

“And the trick here is that I’m sure to get tortured ever so often?”

“We are the Zoldyck family after all,” Illumi reached for your hand again, quite impatiently at that as he nearly grabbed it himself just like that, but you wouldn’t dream to refuse this new path when your hand fit so well in his.

“Awesome! This is going to be so much fun~”

**Author's Note:**

> this goes out to that one friend that probably still hasn't made an ao3 account even when promising to do so, but hey, if any of you enjoyed it too then thanks!! because I was really projecting here but here you go,, simping for Illumi is f u n


End file.
